Hullo Old Home

[brian daley]

Assurity 4

I had spent so much time on the Assurity, it was near three months now since we had boarded her and it was fast becoming my home.
My cabin was comfortable, it had a bunk ,daybed, writing desk ,wardrobe and a nice wing chair. The bulkhead between the bunk and daybed had a washbasin and the mirror above it had a nice oil lamp that was on a gimble. The brasswork on the porthole and lamp I kept polished to a nice sparkle and I mounted a few prints to give the place some colour. An officer on a pre war ship would have been proud of such a berth,to me it was like a sanctuary from the problems ashore.
We were running around the coast of Europe and Britain ,never touched Ireland or Scotland ; Immingham, Brunnsbuttel, Irlam and ports along the Bristol channel and the Severn were our main ports of call ,with the occasional trip to Donge in France .We were on foreign going articles and so were entitled to our duty frees ,which we took up to our allotted amount. We did?nt have to pay for our food ,as you would on coasting articles, and we had fairly good cooks. I say cooks , because since that unfortunate incident with the cook over little Paddy ,the cook from Down Under got another ship. We had another guy from Hull as cook this time, he was a good humoured guy,not as short tempered with the kids as his predecessor was and he had been deep sea for years.
Someone told him about the ship being haunted and he was very sceptical , he did?nt believe in ghosts and raised the issue of his disbelief more than a few times. He was shown the Roneo?d copies of Dennis Wheatleys letters and said that anybody who believed in that ****e ought to be haunted. Oxymoron or what?
Well one bright and sunny Sunday morning we were steaming down toward the River Loire,the sea was as flat as a pancake and all those off watch were free to make and mend, or just laze about. Our cook chose to have a few moments on his daybed reading his novel. All was quiet save for the steady heartbeat of the engine, some of us were sitting in the mess having a refreshing cup of tea when we heard a crash and a scream. It sounded like something had fallen on someone ,but we were a tanker ,not a cargo boat. We got up to see what had happened when up the companionway came the cook. He looked like he had seen a ghost, and he had ! Or rather he had seen the actions of a poltergeist. He said he was enjoying his book on his daybed and was having a smoke when he noticed the jar of Brylcreem float up off the shelf beneath his mirror ,he thought he was imaging it and then it came flying toward his head. He managed to dive to the deck and the jar smashed against the bulkhead where his head had just been resting. It shook most of us up because up until that moment we had only thought of the ghost as being another sailors yarn.
Before I leave the subject of ghosts I must tell you this tale. The wings of the bridge on the Assurity were different from most ships I had been on, the dodger, that part that curves around from the forepart to the after end of the bridge ,was about 18 inches short of the side ,the navigation lights were set back at the after end of each side.and there was a scupper that ran to the forepart. . We were able to stand outside of the bridgedeck to polish the lamps and do the varnish work. One of the young EDH?s must have studied this and played a near fatal prank on the mate. He was due to relieve his pal on the wheel midwatch on the 4 to 8 in the morning , he got a pair of tights from the ragbag and made his way to the bridge .He did?nt go right up to the bridge deck, he climbed the bridge ladder and clambered over the afterpart by the starboard light and edged his way along below the dodger, until he was level with wheel house . He was five minutes early for his turn at the wheel so no one was expecting him at that moment. He pulled the tights over his head and then raised it above the dodger. He groaned loudly and the mate, who was walking across the wheelhouse ,turned and saw this green apparition moaning like one of the undead. The guy who was waiting at the wheel said he was frightened but the mate, he made a croaking sound and collapsed, one hand clutching his chest and the other pointing to starboard. The relief whipped of the tights and ran to help the mate who slowly came around. The man at the wheel was relieved and got the mate a strong hot cup of coffee. They never ever told that tale until the mate left the ship when he was replaced by the Geordie with the wandering wife.

One run took us to Rays home town and he invited me home to meet his family, they lived in one of those terraced streets that surround the docklands in Tiger Bay. His Dad had been a seafarer, a Yemeni fireman with Smiths of Cardiff,now retired he was the centre of his family and was clearly adored. His mum was one of those indomitable Welsh ladies who could cope with anything ,as we used to say ,she was as sound as a pound. I think he had some brothers but time has erased them from my memory, but he had a sister and she was a beautiful mixture of east and west, her skin was a slight olive colour and her tight black curly hair was as black as midnight. They all made me very welcome and ,as it was Saturday ,insisted I stay for tea before Ray and I went on the town. The atmosphere around the table was lovely ,father sat at the head and his children and wife ministered to his every need .It was like table at Grandmas when I was a boy , good natured and polite. We watched a bit of T.V. and then went to see what Tiger Bay had to delight us with, we got merry and Ray went home and I went back aboard. I was still quite wakeful and so poured myself some duty free and got down to reading my book. About two in the morning Ray came aboard, I saw him as I was on my way to the messroom for a cup of cocoa. He looked distraught and his eyes were red, he had been crying. I asked what the matter was and he said that he had had a row with his mum and dad??..over me. I had mentioned to his mum that I was married but separated, although she never said ought to me then ,she expressed her unhappiness to Ray when he got home. He stood my corner and his dad stood by his mother. It led to an unpleasant row and it near broke Rays heart. That would not be the last time that my marital status would come up against me. I had?nt told my parents or sisters, I was too shamefaced to admit that they had been right in their warnings; but life goes on.

Being mostly in home waters we had a steady to and froing with the crew, a lot of the guys were with us a week or two some like Ray, Big Mick from Lisburn and myself were stayers. Little Paddy ,he di?dnt last very long after an incident in the Bay of St. Brides ,south west Wales . We had hove to there because of a spot of engine trouble and we anchored in mid bay, it was a breezy Sunday morning and was ideal weather for messing about in sailing dinghys. One little two hander hove to under our stern and the man at the tiller called up and asked if we would like a Sunday newspaper from the shop , I was quite pleased and asked if he could get the Observer and Sunday Express, little Paddy came out of the galley and called out ?An? if yer kin ger some of dem feckin Mars bars it?d be feckin great? The mans daughter ,or friend , was shocked by this verbal outrage and the dinghy took off and was never seen again.
Paddy compounded this felony in Lowestoft when he got horribly drunk with one of the JOS.s, I was watchman that night and I heard the racket as the pair of them made their way down the quay to our ship. Paddy was so drunk that his balance was terribly awry, it might look funny in the movies ,but being that drunk near water is fraught with danger. I stood at the top of the gangway to watch as they staggered their way aboard. I stepped down away from the gangway to to let them pass ,the JOS almost fell on the deck as Jimmy made it to the top step of the gangway. His eyes were near closed and he was swaying badly, like a puppet whose strings have been cut ,he collapsed and slid through the gangway chains between the ship and the gangway. We were light ship and were high out of the water, I dived across the gangway and managed to grasp Paddys wrist. He was totally unconscious and was deadweight in my hand , I managed to raise myself to my knees and cried out for help. Paddy was slowly slipping from my grasp. Big Mick appeared behind me and was able to grip Paddys hand, we thus hauled him back on board,dead drunk and out of it. The whole episode had been viewed from amidships and young Paddy was given his marching orders when we got back to Immingham.
We hauled up at Felixstowe a short while after that incident and Big Mick said he would show me his old hunting grounds in Ipswich from when he was stationed in East Anglia with the US Airforce,it proved to be an interesting night out ,but I?ll save that for next time.

[pablo42]

Nice one Brian.

[lindylou]

I've got a bit behind with 'Hullo Old Home' - - will take some catching up with

[brian daley]

Time For a Change
And so we found ourselves in Felixstowe, I cannot recall much of the port ,there were s few little coasters and fishing boats in ,we were there with another cargo of Jet from Germany. Because we were going to be there overnight ,Big Mick suggested going with him to his old U.S. Airforce haunts in Ipswich. It was a place that I had never been to before and so I was happy to keep him company.
On the way up there he said he was going to see if he could pick some woman ,any woman ,up and see if she would go back to the Assurity with him ;so I was going to be a gooseberry.
It was mid evening by the time we got there , mid evening on a Saturday night and it looked like Ipswich was closed. But Mick knew where he was headed, in was in a shabby side street , must have been fruit and fish stalls there in the day time because the place was littered with all the detritus of a market. The bar we went into looked like it had seen better days, the walls were varnished with nicotine and the lighting was low and murky. There were very few customers in the bar. Looked like we were in for a wild night. Of the U.S Airforce there was nary a sign , had they flown the coop? A little way down the bar from us sat a young brunette who two young black men sat each side of her; both of them were making a play for her and it was interesting to watch.
They might have been twins , dressed identically it was hard to tell one from the other, Little Richard seemed to have been their model ,their luxuriant black hair was pomaded into a DA, and they had full drape jackets with velvet collars. Mick kept giving them withering looks, he did?nt like to black guys dating white girls and I kept trying to distract him. ? She should be feckin? ashamed of herself, she would?nt be doin? that in New Orleans? Just then a working girl came in the bar, thank god, if she had?nt arrived I?m sure Mick would have started a ruck with those kids.
The working girl was quite pretty and Mick made his move quite quick ,not that he had any competition, he was just eager for feminine company. He brought her back to where we were seated at the bar and made a quick intro duction. More drinks were bought and Mick started canoodling just like the black kids down the bar. I was bored witless, afraid of Mick starting a fight earlier , I was now on the outer edges of his chat with Miss Ipswich.
It was long coming but closing time finally arrived , Mick was in seventh heaven because his lady was happy to go home with him, home being the Assurity. We were walking three abreast down the pavement toward the station when a long and low American limo pulled up alongside us , it was moving at our pace and the front passenger window rolled down, a rock faced guy with a snappy panama jutted his head out of the window an said in a loud voice ?Where are you going Mary?? I was between her and the car and saw her tremble visibly. ?It?s none of your business ? Mick growled. She stood still, looking fearfully at the car, there were three heavies in it. Mary was mute with fear. ?Are you taking them to the flat? this was asked in a voice quiet and menacing .?Tell ?im to feck orf? thundered Mick. ? Your friend likes hospital food does he ? the thug hissed . Mary went to the car and the rear passenger door opened and in she went. Mick was apoplectic when the car glided away. The veins in his neck were corded and his face was thunderous. I said we should go and get a fish supper and get back aboard but Mick needed a lot of cooling down.
There did?nt seem to be a fish and chip shop open anywhere, we seemed to be going in circles and then we saw the two black guys and the girl, Mick?s dander was up . They were in a shop door way and were having a three way necking session, Mick wanted to go over and give them a smacking but I dragged him away. Just then we saw a fresh faced young policeman and I asked where we could get some chips. He gave us directions to a place just around the corner, we came back down the street with our fish suppers when we saw the young policeman in the shop door way ; he was getting the bejesus thumped out of him by the black boys?. And the young girl was giving him a kicking too.
?C?mon Brian, let?s give these feckers wot they?ve been needin? all night?
He roared across the street and grabbed one of them by the throat, that left the other guy and the girl. Being a noted coward I was faced with a dilemma , run and let the other chase me or take a chance and get marmalised. I still don?t know how it happened but I found myself alongside Mick and I had hold of the other by his wrists. I was?nt going to let go of them and hit him because it would me he wou;ld be free to hit me. So there we were ,me and the black doing a two step in the doorway with an unconscious copper beneath our feet . Mick was venting all of his fury on his guy and it was in my mind that he could have this guy in front of me when he was ready for him. Meanwhile, the girl jumps on Micks back and starts beating the crap out of him with her shoe, a stiletto heeled one at that. I don?t know how long we were jazzing about but all of a sudden I received a tremendous blow across the back of my head. The black guy in front of me literally blanched with fear and I swung around to see what was up when I received another whack. There was a van load of policemen and they were going to give us all a hiding, thankfully the young copper had come to his knees and called ?Not the white lads Sarge, they?re helping me? The black guys were beaten into the black maria, our fish suppers were squashed into the pavement and we were bruised and tired. The old police sergeant came over to us ,his eyes narrowed to two splits beneath his helmet. ? An? where did you two characters spring from ? he muttered grimly. ? We?re off a boat in Felixstowe ? ? Ye?d best get back there then, we don?t need your type here?
The battered young bobby looked at us ,he was sorry for us but could?nt say it.
One good thing about it all , it was good therapy for Mick.

We did another couple of North Sea runs but the Assurity?s engine was getting much the worse for wear, the captain told us we would have to got to the company?s H.Q. in Greenhithe on the Thames. Engineers from the Newbury company were coming down to see what the problem was ,we would be having at least a weekend in Greenhithe.
Geographically, Greenhithe is right by were the Dartford Bridge over the Thames is, but this was 1963 ,that bridge was still on the drawing board, back then the little port was a bustling place, Everards had nigh on a hundred or more vessels , deep sea ,coasters, sailing barges and sundry other vessels.
We got there early on a Saturday morning and were moored up to buoys just off the port. There about a half dozen vessels moored up and the jetty?s and wharves were humming with life. A mad cacophony chipping hammers ,drills ,klaxon yelling, steam whistles blowing. Liners ,great white castles of majesty, vied with bustling beaverish tugs, and grizzled old sailing barges pushed along by gusts of wind. I loved the place on sight. Right on the Thames, every ship headed for all the London docks passed this place and there were many ,many ships in those days. Going to Tilbury, East India docks , Surrey Commercial , to the wharves and reaches that stretched right up to the Pool of London. The air was alive with the sounds of trasde and commerce.
I had been suffering with a tropical ulcer on my neck, it was from a bite I had received somewhere on the west Coast of Africa. Captain Fane had made arrangements for me to go to a hospital in London which specialized in tropical diseases ,so, no sooner had we moored to the buoys I was put on train to London to have my treatment. Thinking back ,life was so much more orderly then, there were frequent trains along the river to the city, quicker than a bus and just as cheap. I was quickly seen to at the hospital and ,because it was a half day I spent a few hours up the West End just looking at the sites. I?d only seen a bit of London before ,when with the sea school, and that was Kensington and the bit between Whitehall and the Embankment. This time I looked around Trafalgar Square, walked up to Piccadilly Circus and had some pie and chips by Leicester Square. I went and had a look at the second hand bookshops in Charing Cross road. I was looking for a particular book, part of a series that I had been introduced to by the bosun on the Assurity. A week or two before we arrived at Grenhithe ,the bosun had loaned me a book called ?A
Fox Under My Cloak? . It was by Henry Williamson and was semi autobiographical. I had never read such a powerful book in my life; written as a novel ,it depicted life in the trenches in the first World War. Never before had I been so moved by a piece of literature, little did I know that it would take me all of eight year before I succeeded in reading all of the work, ?A Chronicle of Ancient Sunlight? By the time I turned the last page ,I found that my world and my way of thinking had been changed beyond my imagining.
The first steps in that change began when I returned to Greenhithe.

[pablo42]

Great Brian, keep 'em comin'.

[clancy]

hi brian have just got upto date with your yarns keep them coming

[kevin]

hi brian have just got upto date with your yarns keep them coming

Hey Clancy, you've been quiet. Howya doing?

[brian daley]

OLD FATHER THAMES
I got back from the West End about 8.30 in the evening, I hadn?t had time to take a good look at the place we were now moored up at, leaving for the City had been a hurried affair. The high street was very quiet, it was not yet dark and you could see the buildings that housed the various trade crafts, the sail loft ,the blacksmiths shop, the rigging stores chain locker and many ,many more little stores and workshops, There were two sailing barges laying alongside each other ,white with scarlet and gold taffrails, they looked like barges fit for a royal personage so graceful did they look. One was called Ethel and the other Fred, or was it Frederick? Whatever, it made me think of the neighbours in the ?I Love Lucy Show? on t.v.
For a little hamlet,the place was so small it could not be termed a village, there were plenty of pubs. The length of the high street would be no more than 500 yards, if that, but there were five alehosuses in there. I called in at the one nearest to where the Assurity was moored off by ,it was called the Brown Bear. Like the rest of hamlet ,it was old ,the sailors of a century ago would have felt at home there, electricity was all that was different . The pub was very quiet ,no conversation could be heard and I got the strangest feeling as I entered ; the place was quite full yet as silent as the grave. I turned and looked around the room I became aware of being the object of everyone?s gaze. The air was acrid, crackling with tension and about eight or nine faces were pointing towards me. I felt as awkward as could be , I had expected to see Ray ,Johnny ,Mick but here i was ,faced by a hostile bunch of strangers.
A huge guy uncoiled himself from his seat and walked toward me ,a look of recognition on his face, he turned to the rest of the crowd seated and said ? I know him !? and turned back to me saying ?Hiya Brian? i was stumped, i did?nt know him, he told me he?d been a deckboy with me on the Chuscal .
It had been his first trip and that was in the autumn of 1961, near two years had passed and that young stripling was now a full grown man. He was a good he ad higher than me and was very strong looking. He was very deferential to me and took me over to meet his shipmates. The atmosphere changed immediately he sat me down , I had?nt hazed him on his first trip and that counted for a lot now. He told the company about the Chuscal and how kind I had been to him. I still treated him as i had when we sailed together, I gave him a pound and told him to get the beer in ,the crowd looked on as he stood up and went to the bar. One lad said ?He would?nt do that or us? and I said ? Well he was?nt your peggy was he!?
When Alf came back with the beers I asked him if he had seen anyone off the Assurity, a hush came over them all , Alf asked ? Are you on her?? I replied that i was and he then told me that they had had a bit of a scrap with the lads off her and that they had all gone back aboard. I could?nt believe it , we had some pretty tough characters among our crew and Alf and his mates had given them a battering. I told Alf that he had been out of order and that we were going to be here for a few days so he should behave himself. He blushed and smiled ,?For you Brian, anything? I stayed until closing and had an enjoyable time with the crowd. Most of them were off the Allurity ,which only worked on the Thames, she bunkered the ocean going vessels along the river, a bit like a floating garage. They were in port every weekend and most of them spent their time in the Brown Bear.
The landlord and landlady of that establishment were a lovely couple called Jimmy and Effie Uglow. He had been a sailing barge skipper and she his lifelong love. I liked them on sight.
As I wandered toward the door to make my way back to my ship, Jimmy called me over and told me that they did a lovely Sunday roast if I wanted a proper meal tomorrow , I told him wild horses would?nt keep me away. One of the lads off the Allurity volunteered to scull me out to the Assurity, you could?nt row on the lower reaches of the river ,the flow was too fierce.
When I got back aboard everyone seemed to be abed ,the alleyway was eerily quiet. Iwent around to Ray?s cabin and found him with his arm in a sling. I knew what had happened to him, but I asked him anyway. He said that they had no sooner sat down for drink when insults began to fly back and forth between the river men and the deep sea men (our boys). One thing led to another and a full scale barney took place. I really felt sorry for Ray , was it my fault for not being there?
He said that there was a South African who had been the main man and that a big kid called Alf was providing the muscle. I had a smoke with Ray and then went to my bunk. It was beautifully peaceful, just the occasional sound of passing vessel.
I awoke on Sunday and was shocked to se that I had really over slept, it was nearly opening time and i was still abed. I got up and showered and sauntered down to the messroom to see if there was anyone about. The cooks were busy in the galley with Sunday lunch and i remembered invitation, hurried down to Ray ?s cabin to see if he fancied a trip shore but he shook his head wearily, I got the same reaction from the rest of the crew ,they had had their taste of Greenhithe and did?nt like it; the thought of that Sunday roast propelled me ashore. Our jolly boat was tied up amidships and I asked the mate if i could use it to get ashore, .he asked me if i could scull and I told I had learned to do it at the training school. He said he would give us a blast on the ship?s hooter if he wanted it back and I told him that I would be in the Brown Bear having lunch.
As I was sculling ashore I noted that there were a few jolly boats tied up at the jetty?s. Brown Bear was going to be busy then. I made the boat fast to the jetty and walked up to the high street, it was empty but there was music sounding out from the Prince of Wales. I looked over to the Brown Bear and there was a well set man leaning against the and doorway, unlike me, he was well dressed, I was in clean working gear, I did?nt want to ruin my shore clothes because our jolly boat was pretty mucky. The man stepped out of the doorway came toward me ,his face was weather beaten and bore a few light scars. ?You must be Brian then? he said as he neared me, he put his hand out ?I?m Percy..........are ye eatin?? we shook hands and entered the Brown Bear. Effie and Jim were behind the bar, they looked up as we came in ? Dinners not quite ready ? said Jim ?you?ll have a drink first eh?? I looked at Percy and he said he?d have a scotch ,i went up to the bar and asked Jim for a whisky for Percy and a ginger ale for myself ,in a whisky glass; I could?nt drink scotch before lunch and Percy would?nt see the difference if it was in a whisky glass( I did?nt want him to think I was a wimp!!) time for another drink I told Percy that I?d have a beer because it looked like dinner was coming up . This guy seemed to have the heeby jeeby?s ,he was sounding me out ,it was so obvious, ?did I know so and so? ? Did you ever sail with...............?? I suppose we were like two dogs sniffing each other out. Only i was one dog that was?nt looking for a scrap, fighting was?nt an art that i had ever cultivated. Lunch was wonderful, the meal was served up on a charger ,it was huge ,beef, lamb and pork. There was Yorkshire pudding and apple sauce ,mint sauce and gravy with pork crackling on the side . A meal for monarchs; pudding was a lovely too, a suetty spotted dick with rich vanilla custard, I can still taste that meal these near fifty years later.
After dining we had a smoke and then I got up to get another round in ?Make it scotch again ? said Percy. When I went to the bar Effie leaned across toward me ?He?s going to get you drunk, watch him? I got Percy a double scotch and a ginger ale for myself. We sat in satisfied silence, the meal had taken the edge off the tension and the whisky was beginning to mellow Percy. He told me he had been married in Liverpool but had?nt seen his family for awhile,?This is a good place to be? he said ?No one bothers you? I did?nt quite understand what he meant ,but kept nodding anyway. Time passed slowly ,with me having one glass of whisky to every three glasses that Percy had. He could sup some stuff but he could?nt stand thrice the amount I had. Come three o?clock he slumped forward unconscious and Jim said ?He won?t be pleased about that, ye?ve drunk him under the table!!? he laughed ,winking at me and tapping the side of his nose. ?Your secrets safe with me sunshine? I hefted Percy to my shoulder and carried him through the door ,which Jim held open for me ,as I left he told me to watch out for myself. The other pubs were disgorging their customers and there were a couple of the Allurity?s crowd amongst them. Word very quickly got around that a scouser had beaten Percy in a drinking competition. I called to one of the crewmen to ask if he could take Percy back on board and he said ?No problem? and walked down the jetty with me to his boat. We had been joined by a couple of more Allurity men and between us we negotiated Percys safe transfer to their jolly boat. I waved them off and took our boat back to the Assurity. I was met by a couple of our lads ,they expected me to have been beaten up. I guess I was lucky!

Half way through Monday morning Captain Fane summoned me to the bridge, when I got there he asked to come into the chartroom. I wondered what kind of trouble I was in now. There was a large man in there ,he was wearing a beret,which was pulled down to his ears like Benny Hill used to wear his in comedy sketches, he was wearing a voluminous navy blue raincoat. Captain Fane introduced us ? Brian this is Captain Duncan Brown of the Allurity ,he?s got a proposition for you? I wondered what the hell was going to come next; I was?nt long in finding out, Duncan Brown spoke, ?Brian ? he said, ?your boat is going to be here for a little while, I?ve spoken with Captain Fane and he would be quite willing ,with your agreement, for you to swap articles and work on the Allurity while they get this one ready for sea again? he could see my puzzlement and added, ?it will be for no more than a fortnight and I am one man short..................? I felt torn at leaving my mates, especially Ray. Captain Fane clinched it ?Better?n ?anging round here doin? nothin?? I nodded my assent and went down to the messroom to see the lads, I told them what was happening and some of them wished me luck; Ray gave me look that made me feel guilty; I was joining a ship whose crew had given our lads a tanning. I don?t think I fully understood it myself. I went below and packed up my stuff ,a launch was coming for me and I got dressed in my go ashores ,crombie overcoat and snap brimmed trilby topped out my outfit. I climbed down into the launch and stood on the afterdeck waving goodbye to the crew, a sudden gust of wind caught my hat and it went flying away towards the estuary. This was a portent for the future.

[brian daley]

The Allurity,or, A Comedy of Errors

The Allurity was moored up to buoys just a stones throw from the Assurity. She was lying fore and aft on the buoys ,providing the staff at head office with a perfect profile of her. Miss Ethel ,the owners daughter like to look out upon the river and see the various ships tied up in the Greenithe reach of the Thames.
She was a small ex Royal Navy tanker and her Captain had kept her in excellent trim. You could see the polished brasswork of the whistle on the funnel from a good way off.
I was unsure of what kind of welcome to expect when I stepped aboard,she was tiny and had a small crew. Captain Brown was first to greet me and took me up to his cabin to sign articles. On our way up to his cabin I met a man who looked like an illustration for a buccaneer, he had a Van Dyke beard and a wolfish grin ,which betrayed a terrible lack of teeth ,on his head he had a paisley square ,tied just like a pirates. This was 1963 , only bohemians ,or pirates, wore such things then. He wore an officers blouson with chief officers epaulettes. This apparition was the Mate. Duncan Brown introduced me to him and he said ?Welcome aboard matey ,ahaar? in pure stage pirate.
After I signed on I went down to the cabin ,not ,you notice ,my cabin ,but the cabin. This was where the deck crowd lived . All four of us, there was Alf , Percy and a guy just known as Canada. Never found out his real name,he was never willing to divulge it.
I did?nt have to pick a bunk ,there was only one spare and I had that.
After unpacking and stowing away my gear I went up to the mess room to see if I could rustle up a cup of tea; the cook was in there picking out his winners for tomorrows racing at Goodwood. He looked up from the paper and welcomed me with the words ? And you?re the man whose goin? to keep things in order here eh?? I did?nt answer that but asked him what the score was with the crew, they seemed happy enough . The cook replied that Alf had a fearsome temper and had once given Percy a trimming. He said the captain had heard how I had taken control of things in the Brown Bear and had Alf eating out of the palm of my hand. Sunday?s do with Percy had confirmed my status as a hard man and the captain could?nt wait to get me on board. My stomach did a back flip, I am the opposite of hard , a was comfortable with my cowardice ,what the hell was I doing here ?
It was near dinner time and the lads came in off deck and we sat down to plates of burnt offerings from the cook, he was?nt just a bad cook ,he was a LOUSY cook..And we had to pay him to do it ! So there we were ,the four of us pushing whatever it was around the plate and wondering what was going to happen next.
The next thing that happened that Alf was called to the captains cabin ,he was told that his Nan was gravely ill and his mum wanted him at home. He was signed off and on his way home before afternoon smoko. No need to be confronted with Alf then!
A young kid from Dagenham was sent aboard to replace Alf, no problem there then.
We were going to be in Greenhithe overnight and at 5.00 p.m. sharp the captain would be going home to spend the night by the fireside . It would be our job to unship the jolly boat ,which was now stowed aboard, and put it in the water so that Duncan could be ferried ashore. I have mentioned that this was a ?micro? ship compared to the ones that I had previously sailed on , it is important to bear that in mind when I relate what happened next.
There was no bosun on the Allurity , the mate did that job, he put me on the falls of the derrick. For those of you who are shore wallahs I will explain this as clearly as I can. The derrick is a boom,this is raised by hauling on it?s falls ,previous to the Allurity ,all the falls had been wire rope ,this one was rope ,two inch. You raise the derrick and there is a runner that goes from the top of the derrick through a block and goes down to a second block by the bottom of the derrick and a rope or, wire , is fed through those blocks to a winch . The other end of the runner has a hook on it and this is attached to a sling with four hooks on it , these hooks go through iron hoops on the side of the jolly boat. So the lads first raise the Derrick ,my job, then they lifted the boat . Two wires ,called guys, are attached to the top of the derrick so that when it is raised it can be pulled over the ships side. It was my job to lower the boat when it was over the water. I had the rope fall wound round a cleat, that bore the weight instead of me .It was a procedure I had carried out many ,many times. On a bigger ship!. I had three turns of rope around the cleat and Canada told me to start lowering away. I fed the rope into the cleat but was looking at Canada for guidance ,never noticing that three turns was two too many. I looked just in time to see the loose turns jump clear of the cleats and the Derrick plummeted down ,hitting the rails and smashing the jolly boat to matchwood. There was the total silence of disbelief as we ,all of us , watched the wreckage float away on the ebbtide. Just then ,the bereted figure of Duncan Brown stepped through the accommodation door. He looked as though he was struggling to understand what was happening.
?Where?s the boat ?? he asked . The mate was speechless ; I started to try explaining what had happened. When he realised that I was the cause of this catastrophe he said ? It was an understandable mistake , you?re not used to us little ?uns ? The lads were stunned, and so was I ; it appeared that this man wanted me at any cost.
The whole episode had been viewed quite clearly from the windows of head office. It was a spectacular start to a star crossed sojourn.
The next day we went to a little jetty in Swanscombe where we loaded some fuel for a ship in the West India dock , the man on the jetty was Quasimodo?s younger and uglier, brother. He was as ugly in his habits as he was in his looks,but more of him later. We tootled off to the West India dock and our bunkering was going to take all night so Canada took the first watch on the pump, an old donkey engine, and Percy invited me and the New Kid ashore for a swift one. There was a pub in the docks but I have long forgotten it?s name but it was what was in the pub that made me take the next step in compounding the image of me being hard. There was an ?Test your strength? machine by the bar counter. A simple old fashioned affair, there was a pistol grip handle which you squeezed,after putting your threepenny bit in the slot. You squeezed the grip and a finger went around a dial ,telling you if you were a weakling or a Hercules,with all the gradations in between. Percy stuffed a threepenny bit in and the needle went three quarters of the way around the clock. It was pointing at strong He shoved another coin in and said ?Here?ya Brian ,you have a go? I did?nt want to because I knew it would show ?Wimp?. He pushed me to the machine and said ? Go on boy ,do it!!? I gripped it and the needle went right around the clock and Percy?s eyes near started out of his head. ?What the f??!!? he exclaimed staring at the needle now pointing toward ?Superman?
I was dumbfounded and refused Percy?s kind offer to pay for another go , if I did?nt know anything else ,I knew you should always quit while you are ahead. After that silly little incident Percy became very deferential to me . Looked like Duncans plan was working out.
The engine room crew on the Allurity we all from the Yemen, they never had a messroom of their own and used to eat on the poop ,the back end of the ship. They cooked their own meals ,which used to smell delicious , but there was no fraternising with them . They were a real crafty crowd of so and so?s and the cause of the trouble between the deck crew and them was water. The Allurity had a very primitive system of plumbing ,if you wanted a shower ,you had to go on to the fiddley (the top deck above the engine room) where there was a hand pump. If you pumped the handle for about 450 times it would give you enough water in the tank for a good shower. Trouble was old Abdul and his friends used to watch you do the pumping and then all jump in the shower together. You could only be sure of a shower if it was very late and they were in their bunks.
We used to get our own back on them in a very crude manner, pleas and entreaties had no effect on them. We used to save up a good gutful of wind and when they were sat at their meal we would walk by and let it rip. They used to tip the remains of the meal into the river, silly I know ,but it was war.

The chap in charge of the Arabs was on old Irishman called Tommy, he was very evenly tempered, I never heard a cross word pass from his lips. Like Canada ,he was another man with a secret, he was on the run from a very angry ex wife. He would never be traced here because ,as I learned during my time aboard her, there a system ,for those who wanted it, of no names ,no pack drill. All these guys were sailing under false colours.
I found out Tommy?s little secret one Saturday afternoon , the cook used to go home from Saturday lunchtime until Sunday lunch time and so we had to shift for ourselves for the evening meal Saturday and Breakfast Sunday. Percy and I used to have Sunday lunch at the Brown Bear so that was no problem.
One Saturday ,after the cook had departed for home ,I smelled the most glorious aromas wafting from the galley. I went up top to have a look at who was creating this gastronomic delight and found Tommy in the act of extracting the most beautiful looking pie from the oven. The crust was embellished with pastry cows and oak leaves. I had never seen ,or smelled, anything so delightful.
?Where on earth did you get such a wonderful pie?? I asked him .? Would ya like some?? he replied . I nodded and he plunged his knife into the golden crust ,releasing yet more meaty aromas. He just split the pie between the two of us and my portion filled a dinner plate. There were chunks of beefsteak, meltingly tender kidney and caramelised potatoes and carrots. I sat and savoured every last forkful. I asked him where he had learnt to bake so well and he told me that he had served his time as a chief pastryman on the P&O and Cunard line. He had packed up the sea when he married a Londoner and got a job as head pastry cook at the Caf? De Paris. When his marriage hit the rocks he took a powder and found his way down to Greenhithe, where he ended up on the Allurity , this was now his home. I was finding out that Greenhithe was like a creek where the flotsam and jetsam of the merchant navy got caught up for a while???like I was.

[brian daley]

Allurity 2

So there we were ,four pieces of driftwood who had ended up ,for four different reasons on the good ship Allurity. Percy and Canada had been on her a good while, I was yet to see how long I would be there. The fourth man? The fourth guy never lasted more than a few days, we three were odd you see, keeping dark secrets and never opening up to strangers.
Canada was the deepest, we knew nothing about him, he was laconic, his conversations consisted of ?Yup? and ?Nope? unless he was talking about deckwork ,then he could string a word or three together. He was?nt a miserable man ,far from it ,he would sit and listen in on conversations ,laugh at your jokes, but he never, ever ,talked about home or his past. Old Tommy reckoned he?d killed his wife back in Vancouver and was on the run ,said he?d told him when he was drunk . But that was just scuttlebutt . He seemed a steady kind of a guy.
At weekends he was a little bit different from your average Joe though; he would buy a half litre bottle of Queen Anne whiskey and a bottle of Codeine and hide himself in the rope locker and not come out until Monday morning.
Percy and I settled into an easy relationship, he realised that I was?nt going to be a hell raiser and we became shipmates. He liked a drink and a good time and like me , was on the verge of a matrimonial split. We did?nt talk about the why?s and wherefor?s it just was and was tacitly accepted as such.
A couple of day?s after the jolly boat fiasco ,we headed down to Thames Haven ,near the estuary ,that was where we filled up. We tied up alongside a wooden jetty on top of which there was a little fuelling station. I went on to the jetty and spoke to the pump attendant there. The fuel pipe was exactly the same as at any garage,a pistol grip with trigger feed. I stuck the nozzle into our tank on the fiddley and the pump man said he would start up after his lunch .? Get dahn ta yer messroom mate ,ah?ll give yer a whistle when ahm ready ? I nodded and went below for a smoke. I sat in the messroom doing the Daily Mirror crossword .I was having a good run ,got most of the answers and then everything went dark ! I looked at the portholes and they were black. ?F**k!!!? It was oil ! I streaked up to the fiddley and stepped out on to a sea of thick black oil. I looked at our tank and saw the oil gushing out. I shouted up to the pump attendant and he came scuttling to the edge of the jetty. Eyeing the scene he groaned ?Aw fack me mate ?..? Behind me I heard the door to the bridge open and turned ,just in time to see all 18 stone of Duncan Brown go arse over tip as he stepped into the oil. I squelched toward him and helped him to his feet. He looked frantic ,not comprehending what had happened to his lovely little vessel. The whitework was now black , he shook his fist at the pumpman and muttered an expletive. I was amazed ,he did?nt blame me!
It took some time to get the Allurity back to her pristine condition, Percy and Canada ribbed me unmercifully and the mate was furious that Duncan had?nt sacked me. When he asked what relation I was to the captain I just winked and came out with a cod Roman proverb ? The less you know the wiser a man you will be , Marcus Plautus A.D.43? He looked quizzically and cackled ,repeating what I had said ,?Arr I likes that ,Marcus oo? ? I used to feed him these little proverbs whenever the need arose and he would store them in his memory ,reciting them in the pub when in his cups.
In the big world out side the Thames ,Britain was moving into the sixties with great gusto, those kids in Liverpool were still making records and they were even appearing in the papers advertising those naffest of naff jeans.?The Beatles wear Lee Cooper Jeans? boasted the ad. Showing four very slim young guys with their backsides posed so that the label showed up prominent . It was an artists impression, those jeans were so limp that they would never look smart on anyone. There were new cars ,radical designs ,the Ford Corsair looked very American ,We had only seen artists impressions of that too ,but ladies fashions was where the real differences were seen. The skirts were becoming shorter and the colours brighter ,the mini skirt had?nt yet arrived but the 50?s look was well and truly dead.
The cook had a little transistor radio and he used to hang it by the galley door so that we could hear it in the messroom . The pirate radio stations were starting up , one of them was on one of the old Martello towers down at the mouth of the Thames, but our favourite was Radio Caroline. This station had the Kenny and Cash show, Kenny Everett and Dave Cash, it was like listening to Jack Jackson on speed( remember him ,one of the greatest) .This was so different from the BBC with Godfrey Winn and Victor Sylvester.
One of the fourth men we had was a kid from Dagenham, he was a breath of fresh air ,he was the sixties, he knew who was who and what was what. ? Them Beatles mate, great, but wait ?til ya hear the Stones? he was talking another language. He knew about Carnaby Street and disco?s wore his hair long(collar length) and winklepicker shoes with skintight trousers ,old Tommy thought he was ?bent? ,old Tommy was wrong ,he was the future.
Another fourth man was a wrestler ,I won?t mention his name ,he seemed a fairly o.k. person ;one Saturday we went to Gravesend together to see the latest film smash ?Dr No? with Sean Connery . It was brilliant to see a British film that was not about kitchen sinks and abortions. That film was sheer elegant fantasy and the public loved it. However, when we were on our way to the movies, we were looking at some shoes in a shop window when the 4th gave a little groan ?Phhwoar ,Look a that scouse? he said. I turned to look and could?nt see anything but a little pigtailed girl wearing patent leather shoes and a polka dot dress. ?what am I supposed to be looking at?? I queried . ? Her ,her over there ? he muttered, his eyes shining and a leery grin on his face. It was the little girl.
I burst out laughing ,thinking it was a joke. The look on his face told me different. He was a paedophile. My skin crawled . Thankfully he left very shortly after that incident. His replacement was not much better.
Sundays would , invariably ,find us moored up outside head office. If we had got there late on Saturday night ,Canada would forgo the Rope Locker and go to the Brown Bear with us. This was one such a weekend, we had met the new 4th man ,again a young local ,he had a few drinks with us on Saturday night and departed our company at closing time .We thought he had gone to spend the night at home. So there were just the three of us in our bunks when we got our heads down, I had the bunk above Canada and Percy had the bunk below the 4th man. After a heavy booze induced sleep ,we awoke to the sound of music, music? In our cabin ?. Music and newspapers , the Sunday Times ,The News of the World , People ,Express etc ,etc. What was going on? It was the new kid , he brought a radio and the papers, made us all tea and toast and we lay in bunks ,luxuriating with breakfast in bunk and music too.!
Time passed peacefully as we scanned our Sunday papers, the sounds of a launch came close, next thing we felt the bump as it came alongside . Percy looked up at me ,his face a question mark. I shrugged, had no idea. Heavy footsteps echoed through the steelwork ,a lot of them. We sat up ,Percy ,the 4th man and me ,I could?nt see Canada. The door burst open and a load of helmeted policemen came in ;they raced across the cabin and dragged the 4th man off his bunk. He was handcuffed and led away, Percy asked a policeman what was happening and the policeman replied that the kid was known villain who had broken into an old ladies house last night and stole her purse and radio. He took the radio from the bunk shelf and ,when the launch had departed, the cabin returned to silence . About twenty minutes after this Canada gave an enormous sigh of relief. Was old Tommys story true?
A few days later we were bunkering one of the Indian JAT liners up in Surrey Commercial, I relieved the new 4th man on the pumpwatch, we had to keep the donkey engines piston greased and watch out for the ladder. This we would prop against the side of the ship we were bunkering, we usually propped it so that it could ride up the other ships side as we emptied and grew lighter and the ship we were fuelling got heavier and sunk lower in the water. You had to be on the ball to keep on top of things. You made the ladder fast to the other ship with gantlines ,you never, ever stuck it through the other ships railings . I had just taken my turn and was greasing a very dry piston when I heard an almighty crack ,followed by a splash. I ran out of the pump room and saw the broken stump of the ladder laying on our deck and the top half was nowhere to be seen. The 4th man had stuck it through the rails of the JAT boat. Duncan had come out on deck after hearing the crack , he looked at me ,his face bore the look of someone cursed. He shook his head sadly and went back in to his cabin. After my spell at the pump , I got dressed and Percy and I went to a dockside pub and got well lashed. How long could my luck hold out?
Picture below are the Allurity ,and then a picture of me a pianist and Percy on the "lash" outside Surrey Commercial docks.

[pablo42]

Great story Brian.

[brian daley]

Interlude
Whilst I was working on the Thames we used to weekend in Greenhithe, as the cook went home for the time we were there ,we had to find somewhere to eat. The Brown Bear was our choice, it was friendly, the ale was excellent and the food was English cooking at its best.
The Landlord and his wife were Jimmy and Effie Uglow, their son Alan was an Oxbridge graduate :I?ve forgotten which one he went to. They had a dog,a collie, and it was very friendly. They used to get plenty of visitors to the pub and they had a bar card upon which there was a photo of Jim and Effie with the dog sat between them. It bore the legend ?Welcome to the Brown Bear ,the pub that is so friendly even the dog says hello? Jim ,or Effie would give newcomers to the pub a doggie chocolate drop and tell them to put it on the back of their hand. The dog would then come over to them and whine and sound that really sounded like ?hello? It was wonderful to see the faces of the foreigners when the dog did its party piece.
Jimmy spent the bulk of his life as a barge captain working for F.T Everard and sons. In the early 30?s he became skipper of the Will Everard and sailed on her right through the Second World War up until his retirement which, I think , took place in the late 50?s . It was then he became the licensee of the Brown Bear.
Jim was a marvellous mine host, as well as keeping a fine cellar and kitchen ,he was a marvellous raconteur. I think he looked a lot like Billy Cotton ,.the old band leader, and his wife Effie was very gracious; Alan ,the son cared not for his appearance but was very erudite and could always offer a good conversation. He had a mind like a steel trap and could knock off the Times crossword whilst serving at the bar.
Friday nights would see Jim taking his lady up to the West End, without fail he would come around to the customer side in his night out suit and titfer, always had a nice silk handkerchief in his top pocket. A very dapper man. He would call whoever was serving at the time and told them it was ?drinks on the house?. I enjoyed that treat quite a few times.
The thing I remember most about that little pub was Jim?s tales, time has eroded the memory of a lot of them so I?d like to share with you the few that I do recall.
The Thames sailing barges were hard working boats that plied up and down the east side ,going as far as Norfolk and to parts of the Channel. They always sailed close inshore and were worked by a skipper ,a mate and, sometimes , a third hand. Mostly a boy.
Jim said that he was carrying an assorted cargo from the Medway up to the Pool and was asked by the agent if he would take two ladies who going to work in a Christian mission in the Polar area . Jim only had a boy with him on this trip, boy with the foulest mouth in Christendom. His every other word was fack, he could even do split infinitves like ? O fackin K!? Jim was worried about Gingers language upsetting the good ladies and so he spent the hours preceding their boarding teaching him the proper words to use in front of the ladie. Ginger had to show them where they could spend their time as they went up to the Pool. He was to start off by showing them the messroom and then show them what they had in the way of toilet facilities. Jim stressed that the proper word for peeing was ?Urinate? and the proper word for a number two was evacuate. Delivering a stern warning about using any foul language , Jim left the welcoming to Ginger while he and the mate got ?Will Everard? ready for the trip up river. She was?nt a massive craft, nearly everywhere aboard was in earshot and ,when the ladies arrived ,Jim heard Ginger welcome them .?Welcome aboard the Will ladies, I?d like to show yer where yer kin park yerselves as we go up upriver? Ginger took their bags and took them to the mess ? Thi ?ere?s called the mess ,yer kin kip ?ere if yiz need 40 winks? He put their bags down there and led them to the stern. Pointing to the galvanised bucket with a half inch rope attached ,he said ? Now if yers need a tinkle, yer kin uranimate in the bucket , but ,if yers need to evacurate ,ye?ll a?ve to sh*t over the side like the rest of us?
Jim said he near ruptured himself trying not to laugh out loud.
The bargemen carried lots of unusual cargoe?s, those of you who read Dickens ?Our Mutual Friend ? will know that there was great trade in human excreta. Dried out in the sewage works of the Thameside towns ,this was carried to some place down river where it was stored and sold to farmers for spreading on their fields. This trade was still in existence when Jim was sailing on the Will and told me this sad story, he was just going into Rochester and he was passing another Everards barge making her way out of Rochester. He hailed her ? Where r?yer bound ?? back came the reply ? Upriver? Jim then noticed quite a few people on deck, ? Wot?r yer carryin??
He queried , back came the reply ? A cargo o? sh*t an? a bunch o? Shakespearean Hactors!!?
Jim said he met the other barge captain a week or so later and the captain told Jim that as soon as he had called out his cargo ,one of the old Thespians turned to another and said ?We?ll make the top of the bill yet old boy ?
Another of Jims stories concerned one of the last true barge skippers ,the legendary Bob Roberts of the Cambria,the last working barge on the Thames. I never had the pleasure of meeting Bob , if I had I think he would have been contemptuous of me. He was a true sailor man, no power winches or steam engines for him. Anyway ,Bob was carrying a party of trainees from a sailing club/ school(I forget which) .Bob was scathing about them, they knew it all from books, however, during one such session a lady asked what they would do if the barge sank, Bob replied ?Swim for the shore? she answered ?but I can?t swim? Bob said ?Well ,wait ?til she touches bottom and then run like hell!?
Sadly ,that world is gone now, most old barges have gone for scrap and the few that are left are owned by clubs or individuals. I feel privileged to have spent a short time on their river and to have had a glimpse of how things used to be. I?ll be back aboard the Allurity soon.

[pablo42]

Nice one Brian. Keep 'em comin'.

[brian daley]

From Bad to Worse
I had been on the Allurity for over three weeks now and things seemed to be settling down,I had?nt killed anyone yet and that was some kind of bonus.
Whenever we were moored at Greenhithe ,Big Mick of the Assurity always seemed to be at the bar ,Ray and the other lads had left to go to their home ports, Mick was standby man.. His standing by place was at the bar of the Brown Bear. One night , when I was on boat duty (this meant staying sober and you had to fetch and carry the lads from whatever ships were moored up in Greenhithe) I took Percy and some lads from the Allurity and then went out to the Assurity to collect Mick and the 2nd mate. After a couple more trips I joined Percy and Mick in the Brown Bear. They were just getting a full head of steam on and the jokes were flying thick and fast. Before we knew it time was being called and I had to go around the pubs digging out the lads who had to get ferried back to their boats. They were always three sheets to the wind and it was my responsibility to make sure they got back aboard their ships safely. This usually involved at least two trips, I would fill the boat to its maximum load and then scull out to the moorings. You have to stand in the stern when sculling, you hold the oar in your right hand and manipulate it so that it moves through the water like a propeller. Easy enough, but when you have a boatloads of tosspots you have to keep a watchful eye out for the drunken ?comedian?. This is the guy who will start to make the boat roll , hoping to give some one a ducking. The Thames has no mercy with revellers,you don?t reason with comedians, you just flick the oar up and out of the water and smack them on the head, it usually knocks?em cold ; I only had to do it twice in 2 months. Word soon gets around. Another difficult job was getting the dead drunk back aboard his ship. I had to make my jolly boat fast to the drunks vessel and then sling him over my shoulder and climb the ladder. It was a good job I was fit and that most of the ships were low in the water but there was one time when I was moored up to a ?foreigner? she was empty and the was about a fifteen foot climb to do with a drunken cook. I was half way up the Jacobs ladder and he comes to,wanting a fight. I was sorely tempted to let the bleeder fall ,but we made it to the deck somehow.
I made my last ferry run out of the Brown Bear, I?d take Percy back and then get my head down. Mick was sleeping the night at the pub, he could drink all night if wanted. Percy was flaked out on the bar. Jimmy said he had really lost his crown now, Mick had matched him glass for glass and Mick was still game for another pint or three. I asked him if he would give me a hand back to the boat with Percy and he said he?d be delighted. I took Percys? ankles and Mick took his shoulders and we carried him down the slipway .When we got to the edge of the jetty I turned around ,this time holding Percy by his calves and stepped down backwards into the boat. We were in a little tidal creek and it was fairly low water. Mick had Percy beneath the shoulders and was about to step in to the boat when Percy came awake with a roaring yell , he flexed himself with such force that Mick was pulled through the air,went over Percys head,Percy crashed down on top of me and Mick went head first into the creek. Percy was unconscious again and Mick came to the surface, his head crowned with spent condoms and other unsavoury items. I said goodnight to Mick and ferried Us back to the Allurity????.I had the giggles all the way back, still get them now when I think of it.
I joined Mick for Sunday dinner at the Brown Bear and asked what he was going to do ,wait for the Assurity to be repaired or get a berth on the river. I had been thinking of leaving the Allurity, I was bored as well as jinxed. A couple of brothers from Rochester ran another of the Everard boats on the river ,she had single berth cabins and a smaller crew than the Allurity. Mick said he was?nt sure, he was a thinker,not like me ,impulsive.
Sometimes though, life makes up your mind for you.
We were in St Katherines, bunkering a Baltic trader , I had just relieved the duty pumpman , I checked the ladder,O.K., checked the donkey engine, running like a train O.K.
Gonna be a good watch. The ships engineer signalled that we were finished ,I called the mate and we started to draw our equipment back,the last two items to come back aboard were the horrendously expensive manganese bronze clamps. We used a gantline to lower them to the deck . I made the clamps fast and started to lower them to our deck.When they were halfway toward our deck the gantline started to part, it seemed to happen ever so slowly, the clamps were spinning and the gantline was unravelling, the Irish kid who was supposed to receive them jumped back clear as they hit the deck ?????.and slithered into the dock. Duncan Brown was on the bridge looking at the bubbles rising to the surface . I looked at him and said ?Just drop me off at Greenhithe would you??

The very next day I signed on the Adroity, she looked a lovely little ship, built in Holland and full of mod coms.
She was a river runner ,she was no where near as busy as the Allurity but there never seemed to be any pressure. Her captain was Alan Tremayne, a more nautical name I have yet to hear; his younger brother Peter was his mate. For a couple of days that completed the deck crew.
The Adroity?s jolly boat was a sadly neglected affair. The varnish long gone leaving her teak open to the elements . I suggested to Peter that it might be a good idea if we refurbished the boat.,he was all for it. So I set myself to ,scraping and sanding until we got rid of the dead grey wood. Then I applied the primers, it was lovely to see the old mud coloured boat spring back to life. I painted the stern white and drew a couple of scrolls on either side of the tiller ,the portside scroll bore her name and the starboard side her pot of registry. I did some skull and crossbones on either side of the bow as well as her name. All of the lettering was done in gothic and the taffrail was done in white picked out with gold. I loved that old boat.

[brian daley]

The Adroity

Looking out my window I am reminded of that long ago late autumn, the sky is a watery blue and the ragged white clouds are scudding past ,blown by the northern winds.
I really enjoyed sailing up and down the Thames on days like this, the scenery was unmatched, you pass town and country as you go from the Estuary up to the Pool, the river meanders and each bend brings a new vista. And the river was so busy, you could not relax your vigilance ,nor could you trust other ships to do the right thing. The captain ,Alan Tremayne was a very clever man , I never understood why was master of a little Dutch clog, he was a Fellow of the Royal Society and he was a mathematics Don. I was in awe of the man ,the conversations we had when we were wending our way up, or down, river were fascinating. He was the first person to impress on me how much mathematics mattered, he talked and I listened and asked questions. I learned of how the Royal Society came about during the period called the Enlightenment and how this led to many great discoveries that made Britain a leader in the world. His brother Peter was the complete opposite, he was tall and blonde haired, looked like a young Mick Jagger and had a really ?goonish? sense of humour , being a long time fan of the Goons I got along just fine with him.
With Adroity being idle most of the time I was used to do a lot of ferrying and one day I was asked to pick up young man who had been involved in a shipwreck in the Channel. It was one of Everards that had sunk and he had been picked up by another coaster which was headed for London. I was to meet her mid river opposite our offices in Greenhithe.
The operation went like clockwork, the coaster gently slowed to a halt and the ladder was lowered and down it came our young shipwreck survivor. I was to take him ashore and that would be my job for the day. Now our jolly boat leaked like a sieve but it was manageable,I only used to do short runs but this run to mid river had made her leak more than somewhat and, as soon as he had sat down ,I gave young Jonah the baler and told him to start getting rid of the water while I sculled to shore. I was just turning her head to toward the shore when I heard an ?Oooh sheet? I looked and saw that the young prat had pulled the plug out???..he thought the water would run out,instead we had our very own fountain shooting up amidships. I dived forward and bunged the plug back in and told him ?F**ckin? bale before I made him swim for it? The rest of our journey passed in silence ,save for the slurp and splash as he baled away.
No wonder he was shipwrecked ,most probably scuttled that one.
Mick was still around and the Assurity had departed for blue waters once more, I asked him if he fancied joining the Adroity and he said yes he would give it a go. I took him along to the Tremaynes and they signed him on immediately. They also made him bosun, well, he was older than me and had been around a bit, so what the heck. We were not a liner there was no room for bullshine.
We started to get busy again and were running up and down the Thames every day, in and out of the Pool, KG 5 ,East India, Grays, Dagenham, Surrey Commercial ,Gravesend Swanscombe,Cliffe, the list was endless and I am sure that we bunkered a lot of vessels but, unlike the Allurity , there was no jinx on me here. Met some odd people though, like Quasimodos relative in Swanscombe. When I had been there a few times he invited me into his ?office? on the jetty . ?Ereyar Scarse? he said ? ?ave a look at these then? he showed me some pornographic photo?s of him and a very good looking lady,she was wearing a basque and fishnet stocking while he was shown in various positions. She must have been very poor to let herself be photographed like that , I felt like having a shower after seeing them.
We overnighted at Swanscombe and Mick and I went up to the nearest pub to taste the local brew. I cannot remember the pub or the beer ,but I have a vivid recollection of the journey back to our ship. We must have been a bit like the Walrus and the Carpenter out of ?Alice Through the Looking Glass? We were engrossed in drunken conversation about sailing ships and sealing wax , and cabbages and kings. We must have been on automatic pilot, it was a clear moonlit night and there was a slight breeze riffling the surface of the Thames, we were walking along the jetty ,deep in philosophical discussion ,when I felt the decking move beneath my feet. I looked at Mick and he was swaying too. Was I that drunk! I looked down and saw the river beneath my feet ,I could hardly speak ?Mick , this is?nt the jetty we?re tied up on look down?
The planks were rotten and there were a lot missing ,the pilings were swaying with rivers movements and we were in deep doodah. We looked back at the way we had come and we could see the jetty had more holes in it than string vest. We tiptoed back to the quay,each step taken with the greatest of care. We could hear the planks which had been standing plunge into the waters twenty foot below. When we made it back to hard ground we saw that we had passed through warning barriers and some coils of barbed wire. The Lord surely does look after fools and drunkards.
I was now sleeping at the Brown Bear of a weekend, Mick had talked me into it and ,of a truth ,I quite enjoyed it . No more supping up at 10-30p.m. ,we could sit chatting to Jim and Effie and it was more like a family . There was an incident that unnerved me though. I had gone to bed not, I hasten to add , in drunken stupor. The bed was a lovely old iron framed affair with springs between the frame and a great overstuffed mattress. It did;nt take much rocking to slumber off. I was shaken awake by a lady who was dressed in crinoline and her hair coiled atop her head like a regency lady. I rubbed my eyes thinking it was Effie and the room was filled with an eau de nil glow. As I was about to say something she faded from view and the room returned to darkness. I never discussed the matter with anyone ,they might have thought me mad.
My relationship with Mick was becoming strained by his attitude, I had got him the job and he did?nt want to spend to much time with now that he was my ?boss? I started to think about leaving for pastures new, the decision was made for me by the following incident.
It was the middle weekend in November, I had been ashore for a few drinks and Mick and I needed a ride out to the Adroity. I had met a young man from West Vale in Kirkby and he was really nice, we got on fine and I asked him if he had a jolly boat, he replied yes and we asked him f he could take us out to our mooring . No problem he said . The tide was ebbing and the current was strong so I said that I would scull us ti our ship and then he could take her back. The passage out went smoothly ,Mick jumped aboard and made her fast to the Adroity while I changed places with young scouse. I gave him the oar and then jumped aboard ,Mick set her loose and young scouse cried plaintively that he could?nt scull. The tide had a grip on the jolly boat and it was swept away from us. Mick ran to the bridge and grabbed the Aldis lamp and shone it on him , he was swinging the oar wildly and we could hear him shouting for help . And then he was gone, he fell over the side and that was the last we saw of him. A PLA launch passed near us and Mick flashed her but got no response. We had no radio, no boat, I felt helpless. I could?nt sleep that night knowing I had caused a young mans death. Next morning when the Tremaynes came aboard I told them I was leaving, I blamed myself for what had happened and did?nt want to spend another minute in that god blasted place. When I said goodbye to Jim and Effie they told me that the whole village was upset. I caught the train to London and began a new chapter of my life.