Aftermath
As soon as our foredeck came close to the Gladstone lock entrance ,the shore gang jumped aboard. These were mostly ex Bluey sailors who had swallowed the hook ,they replaced us in our docking positions thus enabling us to go and get ready for home.
Everyone , except the mess peggy, made a dash for the showers ,the mess peggy had to make sure that everything was clean and packed away ,the shore skipper would inspect it and if it was not up to usual inspection standards the peggy could be "logged".That is fined a days pay and have a black mark against him for next trip. We did'nt have too much trouble getting everything squared away, we were going to go "round the coast" on her anyway. This meant having only 5 days at home , rejoining her to discharge her cargo in Glasgow, Hamburg ,Amsterdam and Antwerp ,we would be back in under 3 weeks and then have another 9 days leave. Bootsie , Billo and I decided to come back for another trip ,we had gotten used to each other and we liked the "run".
The crews quarters was filled with crowds of people by the time I got finished in the mess, everyone was going home ,some for 5 days and some who would'nt be making the return trip. The sailors alley was going to be empty and I had to find someone who could take care of Puss while we were on leave. Old Wilf suggested I ask the head man down aft ,he was from Shanghai and had been on the ship for years..
I carried Puss aft and went to the Tomilows cabin ,I pointed to Puss and asked if he would look after her until I came back next week. Smiling and nodding ,he took her from me and gave me the thumbs up. Job done, I went back to our cabin and finished packing. Jimmy the Galley boy lived quite near to me in Garston so we decided to share a taxi. We had'nt officially signed off yet , that would happen tomorrow at the shipping office in Birkenhead. We had to wait to be cleared by Customs ,the "Rummagers" were going through some cabins with a fine tooth comb. There was'nt much you could smuggle from Australia and drugs were not even on our horizons. No, these guys were looking to see if we had the extra bottle of spirits or a surplus packet of fags. Having got our taxi ,not a difficult job ,we then had to negotiate our way out of the dock gate, you were warned by the old hands to have at least half a crown ready for the Bobby on the gate. No money and he would have you out of that taxi and search your cases for contraband.
This was in the days before mini cabs, our taxi was one of those Hackney carriages ,the driver up front in his little cab ,luggage space on the left hand side of him instead of a passenger seat and a great big klaxon horn just in front of the drivers door. A real taxi.
As we drove along the cobbled Dock Road we were in an unending stream of traffic, to the right of us was the Overhead Railway, elevated above the rail lines that ran beneath it. There were steam wagons ,with great solid tyred wheels wheezing there way along, horses and waggons jostling with 10 ton trucks for their place in the traffic. Above us ,the little brown wooden coaches of the Overhead glided gracefully along , no impediments to their passage; on the rails beneath steam tank engines of the dock railway chuffed their way along, big brass bells warning of their progress. The air was filled with the chatter of steam winches and the rattle of chains, the honking of wagons and the whinnys' of horses. The pavements were abustle with dockers, shipmen and sailors of every size and colour, buses and trams made their way through this mayhem, Liverpool in all it's mercantile glory.
Jimmy and I decided to spend some time together if we could, after seeing my family ,I wanted to see Harry .I told Jimmy how guilty I felt and he surprised me by saying that he would like to come and see if he could make him feel better, Mum had said in, her letters, that none of the people from the shop bothered with him now, I thought Jims offer was spot on.
After dropping Jim off we drove into the our square ,passing under the great arch of the service road, my heart beating like a sewing machine . Kids were playing on the swings and roundabouts ,mums and dads leaning on the balconies ,laughter echoing around the buildings, the driver honks his horn and all eyes turn to the taxi.
He spins the hackney around the square and pulls to a stop at the foot of our stairs, I get out and pay him, unload my luggage and notice that I'm surrounded by kids ,little ones. It's still school time , Jess will be at work and Bette down at Banks Road school.. One little kid is smiling at me ,her fringed face with twinkling eyes and lovely smile , it's Chris ,my kid sister, she's with her little friend Doreen and she is too shy to run and kiss me. Leading the way , she scampers up the stairs to warn Mum of my homecoming . Neighbours wave hello as I pass them on my way up, it is a wonderful ,glorious feeling , cries come across from other landings , Mrs Flynn ,Mrs Barnett , Mrs Wade, waving and greeting. And then I'm on our step and there stands Mum, a smile to light the heavens and her eyes aglitter with unspilt tears. The smell coming from the kitchen tells me that my homecoming is being readied. Stuffed and roasted hearts followed by sugar crusted apple pies and custard. After a little hug ,she lets me go and unpack while she goes back to her cooking. Looking out my bedroom window I get a strange feeling,nothing has changed ,everything is just as I left it. The only thing different is me ,and then I realised ,we were one member short . Our Jess.
Jess was not at work as I had thought ,she was now living with her new husband in Walton ,it would seem strange not having her at home any more. The only good thing about it was it meant Bette and Chris now had their own room.
Mum came into my room to see if their was any dirty washing, eyeing my neatly ironed shirts and spotless underwear, she expressed her amazement ,she had expected a load of smelly old clothes.
When everyone was home ,Mum served dinner and the world seemed such a peaceful place ,I had little gifts for them all and I wanted to give them after dinner. I was in my room ,getting the presents from my case, when the front knocker was rapped .Mum answered it ,I heard her say "A. what d'you want ,ar Brians 'me " "I know" answered A,"Ive got something for 'im", she replied. And then I heard Mum screech "Gerroff yer dirty cow!!" and then the door slammed. I asked what had happened and she looked at me ,eyes filled with laughter, "She was wearin' a mac,held closed by 'er 'ands ,and when I asked 'er what she 'ad for yer, she opened 'er mac an' she 'adn't gorra stitch on !!" Mum laughed ,and I limped back into my room.
It was hard, in more ways than one in getting to sleep that night. There was no sound ,the heartbeat that had rocked me to sleep for the past 3 months was silenced.
Next morning I awoke to a smell that I had never smelt at breakfast in our house, bacon and eggs! Mum had been to Coopers in town and bought corn cured bacon in honour of my return. It was a beautiful to start the day. Freshly washed and dressed I had to meet Jimmy and go to Birkenhead ,it was pay off day .We got the tram right down to the Pier Head and then the ferry across to Woodside .On reflection ,there was so little road traffic about then and public transport was so frequent that time was not a problem in getting anywhere. 10'0clock saw us in Argyle Street ,a lot of the crew were already there, looking so different now ,all dressed up their very best suits, some of them had their wives or girl friends with them. As we stood chatting on the steps ,a beautiful maroon coloured Jaguar saloon glided to a halt , "must be the Captains" I thought . Out stepped a very good looking lady and two very smartly dressed schoolchildren and they were followed by the driver, Alf the Chef.
It would be an understatement to say I was gobsmacked ,she was beautiful and he had to be at least 25 stone.!
We would be back here signing on in 5 days time so it was quick goodbyes all around and back to Garston ,we had money to burn!! All ?28-00d of it ,four nice white fivers eight green ones and some silver. My pockets had never been so full.
But first things first, I had to go and see Ann at the cake shop , see the crowd at the butchers see if I could find Ronnie and then visit Harry. I was in for five very busy days.
I made arrangements to go with Jimmy to see Harry later that afternoon ,first it was up to the cake shop, after a quick hello at Kearns, then up to Ronnies place. I felt sorry for the lads in Kearns, they seemed so pasty faced and unsmiling compared to my shipmates, Sid gave me a smile and told me I'd grown and that was about it.
When I walked in the cakeshop I got a fantastic welcome, Ann looked lovelier than ever , we would go to the movies that night and then to the Park on Saturday. I then hurried up to see Ronnie and was lucky to find him in. He had married his Mary and she was expecting their first child ,he asked if I could babysit for them on Saturday and was amazed when I said yes, I would get Ann to do it with me and we could be alone to do what we wished.
I met Jimmy a little while later and we travelled up to see Harry , I had brought the magazines I had saved from Oz, I was full of trepidation ,not knowing how Harry would be. I warned Jim that it might not be pleasant.
We got there just before 5 o' clock, Harry was sat in a Queen Anne chair by the front window ,his head was resting on the palms of his hands when we walked into the room . The atmosphere seemed so desolate , there was no hope left in him. He slowly raised his head and looked at me ,he was finding it hard to focus, recognition crept across his face. Inside ,I cried great tears ,this was the Kid ,indomitable, what kind of God can do that to anyone!! His face was bloated from the drugs and he could only talk with difficulty. I went and sat beside him, showing him the colourful pictures in the pages of those magazines. He rested the palm of his hand on the back of mine ,and I understood ,no use showing him all that ,it reminded him of what would never be. Jimmy was great he spoke to Harry ,telling him of some of the things that we had done ,he even made Harry smile. I was too emotional to handle things at the moment. The front door clicked open and I was startled to see the beautiful supervisor from Woolworths standing there. She crossed over to Harry and spoke softly to him ,there seemed an intimacy between them. Harrys' mum motioned me into the Kitchen and told me that ever since I had left for sea she had visited everyday ,she sat with him until bedtime ,holding his hand ,talking gently. She was truly an angel ,the most beautiful girl in the district, any man would have been proud to call her their own ,but she gave her love where it was needed most. I saw Harry once more before I returned to the Jason, Jimmy continued to see him after I was back at sea ,another unexpected angel.
Sitting in the dark of the cinema that night ,my thoughts were mixed, Anne was by my side but felt guilty about my mate in Gateacre.
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I was a shallow youth, I was so intent on carnal pleasures that I would listen to any fool advice . As we were sailing home ,some of the older Lotharios would give lessons in sexual conquests. No woman likes a wimp, you have to master them ,they love it. If you don't try to tup them they will think you're *****. Just kiss 'em and tell 'em you love them. Let them feel you are excited, that is how they make you feel." "You're a woman ,I'm a man ,we're only acting naturally". "You would be amazed at how successful that is kid , kiss 'em and grip 'em tight and it will come out right".
And thus it was on Saturday night. Anne and I had spent a lovely day in Sefton Park, we had taken a boat out ,gone to the Palm House and walked through the little tunnels ,kissing and cuddling and whispering endearments ;and all the while I was thinking of the night ahead.
We waved Ronnie and Mary off as they headed off to their night out ,the boys were safely abed and I quickly changed the living room into a den of seduction. Anne thought it was fun ,the bottle of wine and the sexy music ,I closed the curtains ,dimmed the lights and sat ,no lay, beside her on the couch whilst I attempted to seduce her.........................t was awful. I was ashamed that I had even attempted it. She was'nt Del, she was a good clean girl who deserved better than this . Anne went home as she had come out, but I could never face her again.
I learned that you must be yourself ,not some cheap piece of work.
I saw her home ,and ,sadly never saw her again, so Anne, if you ever get to read this Anne,............................Sorry.
After a whirlwind 5 days, I rejoined the Jason in Birkenhead. When I went to get Puss back off the Tomilow, he smiled and said "Tank Yo,velly good chop" Poor old puss had ended up as a chow mein.
When we got to Glasgow ,there was a letter from home,on opening it a little piece of paper fell out on to the deck, it was a newspaper cutting from the obituaries column, my best mate had passed on. And thus we pass from childhood to manhood ,via a journey of broken hearts.
The ropes that had tied me to the shore were being severed one by one ,I was on my way to being a sailor.
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