Ricky's Christmas My Arse

[scouserdave]

Source (http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/tm_headline=ricky-s-a--e-for-no1-hit-&method=full&objectid=18065834&siteid=94762-name_page.html)
EXCLUSIVE: RICKY'S A**E FOR NO1 HIT
By Paul Burne

ROYLE Family star Ricky Tomlinson is hoping for a festive number one with his single - Christmas My Arse.

The Scouse actor has put his television catchphrase to music.

Ricky, who plays slob Jim Royle in the BBC TV hit series, said: "It's got rhythm, it's got style, a certain comic class and if Ringo was on the drums it would have everything.

"We'll show Sir Cliff Richard how to do it." Ricky teamed up with Patrick Aherne, brother of Royle Family creator Caroline, to write the song.

Patrick, 44, said his sister backed the song: "I've played it to our Caroline and she's now our number one fan. We're aiming for a Christmas number one."

The pair wrote the song after Ricky filmed the one-off Royle Family special, screened last month.

Record giant EMI are releasing the single. A music industry source said: "It is a very funny song and very catchy."

[Howie]

Ricky aims to be No 1 at Christmas
Nov 10 2006
Liverpool Echo

LIVERPOOL TV star Ricky Tomlinson is hoping for a festive number one with his single - Christmas My A***.

The Royle Family star teamed up with Patrick Aherne, the brother of co-star and Royle Family creator Caroline Aherne, to write the song based on his famous catchphrase.

The pair wrote the song after Ricky filmed the one-off Royle Family special screened last month.

Together with a host of local clubland singers as well as fellow comedian Stan Boardman and Ricky's son Gareth and brother Albert, he recorded the one-off track at Liverpool's Parr Street Studios (http://www.parrstreet.co.uk/).

The track will be released digitally and on CD on December 4 and people will also be able to download it on to their mobile phones.

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[Diane]

I love this song ! love the words and the video !

nice one Ricky !

Christmas - My ARSE !

[brian daley]

Now that yuletide is with us once again I am minded of all those times of Christmas past when it was simpler and ................crap,what am I talking about. Tough titty Christmas's thats what!!..... Our story begins on the morning of Christmas Eve in 1978 ,I was working for Sainsburys' distribution ,driving artics, this particular morning I was delivering the Yuletide provender to their main store in Nottingham. The supervisor on the back door was a not very nice guy called G. He was a skinny, mean minded individual and he could make life awkward for a deliveryman ,so it always paid to keep on his good side. (I can be a right creep when the situation calls for it)
So there we are ,7.30 a.m. Xmas Eve morning and I kick off our banter by asking if he was all ready for the holiday, our conversation turned to his childhood Christmas's. His dad was the local drunk and kept the family on short rations, G held out very little hope of that Christmas being any different from the rest. But, Lo, that year all the family ,Mum,Dad and G, would be spending the holiday at his Uncle Erics in Mansfield. Uncle Eric had a son G's age and they would be sharing the same bed. Uncle Eric was'nt a drinker like his dad and had been known to take his family to Butlins. G was looking forward to this christmas. His dad and Uncle Eric went to the Miners club for a few drinks while the mums made ready for the big day.G and his cousin were tucked up bed before the men came back from the pub and the next thing he knew it was christmas morning and he and his cousin awoke to find the bottom of the bed covered in gaily wrapped presents. Wide awake now they grabbed at the parcels, each one G grabbed had his cousins name on it. sadly he watched as the pile grew on his cousins side of the bed.There was nothing for him. At length he stole from the room and went along the landing to where Mum and Dad were sleeping. His mum woke up as the door opened saw G and shook her hubby awake. He sat up groggily and G said "'Appy Christmas Mum and Dad" Dad broke wind and belched and then said "'Appy Christmas lad" G stood and waited ,expectantly,
Mum nudged Dad, saying "It's bleedin' Christmas Jack" and dad ,taking the hint,reached behind the headboard said "Oh aye, 'appy christmas lad " as he handed G a cardboard cowboy hat that had been cut off the back of a cornflakes box.
I had tears running down my cheeks when he had finished his tale, I was biting the inside of my cheek to stop the laughter!

[Paddy]

Well you wonder why he was a nark.